Thursday, April 16, 2009

Another special morning

This post is basically a recounting of my morning. Slightly hesitant to share, but hoping that it may help someone; when the Lord speaks clearly, I don’t want to pull down the lamp shade. (Please forgive the upcoming train of thought if scattered; I feel it necessary to share as things unfolded.)

As previously mentioned, God’s done a lot in me recently with the issue/desire of marriage (don't worry, the whole post isn't devoted to this topic). Oddly enough, as I’ve grown in contentment with current singleness, my mind has pondered marriage and various aspects it entails all the more (which makes me question the contentment, though I know it’s there). A feeling I’ve had the last few days especially is one of selfishness in taking a daughter of the Lord, as though I may be a distraction from the pure potential of a woman wholly devoted to the work of the Lord. And perhaps, in the heart of “taking,” there may be truth therein. There’s much pressure in the idea of taking a wife, trying to lead her, sacrifice for her, protect her, etc. Not your strength, but Mine. Oh, yes Lord, You’re right…it is written “His pleasure is not in the strength of the horse, nor his delight in the legs of a man; the Lord delights in those who fear him, who put their hope in his unfailing love.”(Ps 147:10-11) God gently reminded me of another way: His daughter given as a gift out of His love. God gives good gifts. And there’s freedom in submission to the Lord, and in receiving a gift with His guidance (and He is faithful to guide).

Good thing for guidance. Marriage is the second biggest decision in life after the choice to follow Jesus, in terms of time (Jesus for eternity, spouse for earthly life) and excitement.

In reflection of His design of marriage, He draws to the surface such a beautiful back and forth process. I love, support, encourage my wife, she’s built up to love and serve others, and as well to return the love to me. And throughout, Christ is glorified. Of course this applies not only to marriage, just in a more intense and intimate way.

(Response to the above rumination)

Lord, I feel like a foal rarin’ at the gates, but I want You more. As desires intensify, is it just more from You to give back, to offer up in sacrifice? Is “it” closer? Aaaahhh…I just want to know. But You, Jesus, are my Daily Bread and my portion. Thank You for the Great Comforter. And Father, thank You for Your gracious smile that my cleansed heart can see. I can only imagine Your joy as You think of the plans You have for me…plans to glorify Your name and to bring joy and happiness to my life (in more abundance, that is, for much joy and happiness You’ve already given). “The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life.”(Gal 6:8) May I live to please Your Holy Spirit, by Your great grace and mercy.

Thank You for breathing life into this dust, for Your careful knitting, for Your innumerable thoughts of love, for Your rod and Your staff. Let me not be slow to acknowledge You and Your mercies everyday of my life. For is it not the Lord who gives life? Is it not the Lord alone who’s worthy of my life? “Blessed is he whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered. Blessed is the man whose sin the Lord does not count against him and in whose spirit is no deceit.”(Ps 32:1-2) In Your forgiveness, “I will not die but live, and will proclaim what the Lord has done.”(Ps 118:17)

“Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to you.”(Ps 116:7)

Lord, this is one of those mornings where everything seems great and I feel connected to You and that I’m hearing You. And tomorrow morning may well be one of the hardest in my life (but “ not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” Matt 6:34). Ah, yes…“This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.”(Ps 118:24) “But may the righteous be glad and rejoice before God; may they be happy and joyful…Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens. Our God is a God who saves; from the Sovereign Lord comes escape from death.”(Ps 68:3, 19-20)

Praise be to the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Amen.

No comments:

Post a Comment